Being Called to the Witness Stand
I can happily say I have never been called for jury duty. I have never been a victim of a major crime or a witness to one.
However, I have been worried about being a witness since the 7th grade. What a silly thing to worry about, you probably think.
I was immature - of course I was, I was just out of elementary school, but probably more immature than many my own age. I had a fantasy that I would marry a missionary and do great things. It never occurred to me that I myself might be a missionary. I was a female in a time that many career doors were shut to us.
The thing was, I could not go to school and share this wonderful thing that happened to me. I still remember that night so vividly. The night I accepted Jesus. But social circles were strictly enforced by all the insecurities of youth.
I could not speak outside of my own clique, that is the same kids I attended church with. They already knew Jesus.
As life continued and I grew physically and mentally (although not necessarily a great deal spiritually) I felt I could not be a witness, because, well, just look at me! I was too imperfect for anyone to believe me if I tried to perform an introduction to the perfect Man.
We can skip some time here, since it isn't relative to this. I am a Very Mature Woman, at least in years. My physical growth has shifted into a lateral trend. My spiritual maturity is, well, I will say progressing, but very slowly.
So why can I not proselytize as so many do? Why can I not be one of those bold people who pass out tracts, who ask strangers if they can talk to them about God? Why do I act as if my Christian journey is a CIA secret?
I have long felt ashamed of this, but still could not bring myself to get out there on a street corner waving a bible. I know some unbelievers. I never have discussions with them. I fear they could out argue me as they are much smarter than I. Besides, when did anyone ever argue another person into knowing Jesus?
There are many, many verses instructing us to spread the word. But what about those of us who aren't missionaries, at home or afar. I was searching for verses, well, to justify my lack of action I guess.
In Peter he is talking about a woman showing her unsaved husband by honoring him.
When they see your respectful and pure conduct....etc. (1 Peter 3:2)
I also felt comforted by this Lead by Example verse, in Galatians
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23)
Remember the childhood song This Little Light of Mine? In Matthew we are exhorted to
In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. ( Matthew 5:16)
OK, I want to throw one more verse at you. It is from Peter, who I really love. He was the undisciplined disciple, the one who had a lot of growing to do. The one who denied Jesus, the one who cut off the soldiers ear, the one who was too outspoken. I get that kind of guy.
But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect,
(1Peter 3:15)
So, I am struggling to be an example, the kind that says," Hey, I know Jesus", since using the actual words is beyond my ability to be bold. If you ever see me being thoughtless or wrong, please attribute it to my human frailty and not to my Jesus.
I pray for you my friends (yes all of you, as many by name as I can) and I hope you add me to your prayer list.
However, I have been worried about being a witness since the 7th grade. What a silly thing to worry about, you probably think.
I was immature - of course I was, I was just out of elementary school, but probably more immature than many my own age. I had a fantasy that I would marry a missionary and do great things. It never occurred to me that I myself might be a missionary. I was a female in a time that many career doors were shut to us.
The thing was, I could not go to school and share this wonderful thing that happened to me. I still remember that night so vividly. The night I accepted Jesus. But social circles were strictly enforced by all the insecurities of youth.
I could not speak outside of my own clique, that is the same kids I attended church with. They already knew Jesus.
As life continued and I grew physically and mentally (although not necessarily a great deal spiritually) I felt I could not be a witness, because, well, just look at me! I was too imperfect for anyone to believe me if I tried to perform an introduction to the perfect Man.
We can skip some time here, since it isn't relative to this. I am a Very Mature Woman, at least in years. My physical growth has shifted into a lateral trend. My spiritual maturity is, well, I will say progressing, but very slowly.
So why can I not proselytize as so many do? Why can I not be one of those bold people who pass out tracts, who ask strangers if they can talk to them about God? Why do I act as if my Christian journey is a CIA secret?
I have long felt ashamed of this, but still could not bring myself to get out there on a street corner waving a bible. I know some unbelievers. I never have discussions with them. I fear they could out argue me as they are much smarter than I. Besides, when did anyone ever argue another person into knowing Jesus?
There are many, many verses instructing us to spread the word. But what about those of us who aren't missionaries, at home or afar. I was searching for verses, well, to justify my lack of action I guess.
In Peter he is talking about a woman showing her unsaved husband by honoring him.
When they see your respectful and pure conduct....etc. (1 Peter 3:2)
I also felt comforted by this Lead by Example verse, in Galatians
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23)
Remember the childhood song This Little Light of Mine? In Matthew we are exhorted to
In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. ( Matthew 5:16)
OK, I want to throw one more verse at you. It is from Peter, who I really love. He was the undisciplined disciple, the one who had a lot of growing to do. The one who denied Jesus, the one who cut off the soldiers ear, the one who was too outspoken. I get that kind of guy.
But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect,
(1Peter 3:15)
So, I am struggling to be an example, the kind that says," Hey, I know Jesus", since using the actual words is beyond my ability to be bold. If you ever see me being thoughtless or wrong, please attribute it to my human frailty and not to my Jesus.
I pray for you my friends (yes all of you, as many by name as I can) and I hope you add me to your prayer list.
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